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2005-10-06 - 11:26 a.m.

Well, the orders for prints literally didn�t flood in � luckily, here at Kickasso HQ I was able to handle the demand, as processing NOTHING doesn�t take too much time at all. My photography obviously weighs in on a par with my writing ability in the �sucks a big dog�s front bottom� division.

Honestly, you try and better yourself in this world�

Now I have to blackmail my parents into buying 300 copies under the threat of their first born descending into the filthy life a crack-addled guttersnipe.

Speaking of which, I noticed last night that the homeless girl who sits at the ATMs just round the corner had splashed out on some kind of fancy manicure. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but it just struck me as a bit odd, and a move that is surely bound to affect business. The shoeless guy on Jubilee Bridge is coining in the sympathy change, but holding out a perfectly clipped and buffed mitt complete with nail extensions might not be such a winner in that whole �give me money for essentials� game.

Good luck to her, though � she needs it, especially given the kind of exchange I caught the end of last night. She was telling some guy to piss off. �I was only trying to give you a bag of toffees,� he was saying. �Well I definitely felt a hand between my legs,� she replied. So either he was a molesting piece of shit, or it was some kind of coded exchange I was better off not understanding.

Anyway, if things carry on this way for much longer, I will soon be needing her in the capacity of an income consultant.

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