2005-04-08 - 11:08 a.m.

Last night I saw that new romantic comedy �Downfall�. For those who don�t know, it�s the wacky tale of odd couple Adolph and Eva, who have organised a big celebration in Berlin to mark complete and utter world domination, only to find they�re being wiped off the face of the earth by the Allied forces, with hilarious results! The scenes where senior SS officers killed themselves and their own families out of sheer embarrassment had them rolling in the aisles! I believe Tom Hanks and Meg (a)Ryan are lined up for the US remake.

Actually, it was a very well made film, though I think one big mistake was casting the most beautiful girl ever invented in the role of Hitler�s secretary, which proved to be disturbingly distracting, especially when she donned a Nazi uniform to try and escape the bunker at the end. Excitement has never felt so wrong.

I imagine playing Adolph Hitler must be quite a demanding thing for an actor, though Bruno Ganz manages to instil power-crazed insanity pretty well. But how did the rehearsals go?

�Er, what�s my motivation for this scene?�

�Oh, imposition of your believed superhuman will on the entire planet, coupled with the desire to exterminate anyone not of pure Aryan descent and the deluded, maniacal, twisted logic of a fascist dictator obsessed with creating his own race.�

�OK, just give me a minute��

I guess the closest thing to method acting he could have got would have been to shadow George W Bush for a couple of months�a little bit of politics there ladies and gentlemen, thanks very much, I�m here all week.