2004-10-01 - 9:12 a.m.
I haven't seen it yet, but everyone seems to be abuzz about the programme NY-LON. For those of you with your finger otherwise placed than on the televisual pulse, NY-LON follows a troubled, transatlantic romance between a bohemian New York (NY!) record store clerk and London (LON!) stockbroker after a chance meeting. A delightful premise that had my mind a flutter with the spin offs that could follow:
LON-LON: follows a troubled, trans-travel zone romance which flits between people living in north and south London. Forever confounded by the excremental public transport services, Kevin and Jackie's love life confined to expensive mobile phone conversations.
CAR-REK: follows a troubled, trans-north sea romance which flits between Cardiff and Rekjavik, Daffyd's visits to the Icelandic capital to see Frida are less than romantic, punctuated as they are by lengthy bouts of compulsive drink driving.
TO-PEST: follows a troubled, trans-continental romance which flits between Tokyo and Budapest. Ormos thinks he has found the love of his life in Megumi, until her foot fetish begins to reach obsessive levels.
KRAK-HO: follows a troubled, trans-gender romance which flits between Krakow and Ho Chi Min City. Jerzy begins to doubt that lesbian junkie Lien will ever stay off the drugs long enough for her prostitution to help them pay for the sex change operation he has always wanted.
MAD-CHIC: follows a troubled, trans-psychosis romance which flits between Madrid and Chicago. Carlos cannot rid himself of Amy, an apparently normal girl that he met online who now turns up at his villa unannounced, shouting sexual insults or pelting him with offal.
VO-MIT: follows a troubled, trans-political romance which flits between Volgograd and Mitchel, South Dakota. Hardline communists and Republicans Ivana and Mike put aside their political differences and embark on the most bile-inducing soppy love affair ever played out, making those who witness their saccharine public displays of affection ingest their own small intestines in disgust.
TAI-NI-KOK: follows a troubled, trans-proportional romance which flits between Taipei, Nicosia and Bangkok. A potentially satisfying international menage-a-trois looks to be in trouble when Ercan reveals that he's been using root vegetables to pad out his depressingly under-developed groinal region.
HAI-HO-NI-AI-M-HOLM: follows a troubled, trans-rational romance which flits between (ahem) Shanghai, Hong Kong, Nice, Aix-en-Provence, Melbourne and Stockholme. A complex six-way is forever frustrated by the fact that all the potential particpants work different hours, and are never back from the office at the same time.
