2003-02-11 - 3:41 p.m.

Old thoughts, some of them my own:

Happiness is full of signs that say "Make your way to the nearest exit immediately."

Some friends once caught me lying. They said �You�re going to regret lying. You�ll be like the little boy who cried wolf.� I pretended not to know this story.

She said, "I'm constantly disappointed at how little people know me." I said, "Which little people?"

"He said, "If there's a god, why are arses the perfect height for kicking?" and I said, "I've got to agree with you.""

When I was a little boy, a schoolfriend once gave me a can of lemonade. "How kind," I thought, as I drank it down on that hot summer's afternoon. As I finished, he told me that he'd spat in it before he gave it to me, and I thought, "How cruel the world is."

"Self deception is a common human trait. So, too is a belief in fatalism and in being an exception...Nothing can prevent a disaster if it is going to happen and, besides, I will be the exception. Self deception prompts us to proclaim that we will all die sometime of something, but this statement also implies that we always expect to die of something else."

"Baby," I said, "I'm an idiot but nobody knows it but me."

You only whinge when you're sinning.

I love planes because nothing can touch you for hours. Except other aircraft in some fatal air control mix-up, of course.