2002-03-04 - 4:27 p.m.
�We lay on the bed there�kissing just for practice�could we please be objective �cos the other boys are queuing up behind me, a hand over my mouth, a hand over the window��
�and the last 4 nights came along with the speed and alcoholic intensity of a runaway bullet train with a free bar, and there are times (when you wake up) that you think I can�t keep this up and then, later, you�re two drinks in and you�re back on course and not even thinking about it and friends come over and it�s great and then it�s your last day at work and there has to be drinks so that people can pretend they somehow gave a shit, and people are offering to buy and then suddenly you�re being bombarded with character assassinations from nowhere and you�re too quiet and you don�t give anything away and you seem a bit, well, cold but there�s more rounds to be bought and stay for another drink and we didn�t mean anything by it and later someone is trying to take it all back in a weird attempt to what? Get me to forgive them? Get me into bed? But either way it�s too weird and I�m fucking glad to be out of there and the next day starts early and it�s ok because it�s just wine and the company is great even though sometimes I feel slow-witted and kind of a dunce but there�s laughing and secrets and we�re all seemingly so relaxed around each other and it feels really good and I stand up old friends that I�d promised to see so I can stay and keep feeling part of something and there�s drunken arguments but not really and we go to look for trouble in soho and find only tacky gay clubs but that�s ok and kylie has a lot to answer for. And should you worry that �dry days� mean just a half bottle of claret?
�You�re kissing your elbow�you�re kissing your reflection�and you can�t understand why all the other boys are going for the new, tall, elegant rich kids�you can bet it is a bitch, kid��
Still, tomorrow starts the New York trip. At least there won�t be much in the way of drinking that week�
I�m joking, of course.
It�s going to be a great week. Because I know I�ll be seeing some undeniably cool people. And frankly�I think you should be there, too.
�But if they don�t see the quality then it is a apparent that you�re gonna have to change, or you�re gonna have to go with girls�.you�d be better off, at least they know where to put it��
