2001-06-26 - 11:41 p.m.

So in August I have to interview the organisers of what�s not commonly known as the Homosexual Olympics. A few things interest me about this. Firstly, how do they check? It�s not like the disabled games. After all, you can�t really fake an amputation, and I�m sure there are some idiot hetero jocks who would gladly camp it up for a bit of international podium action. Secondly, check out the competition events: Aerobics (extra points for leotard coordination), Dance (YMCA and freestyle) and�Physique. I�m intrigued as to what the demonstration �sports� are: competition quiche making and (thanks surly) bedroom redecoration? Puh-lease.

Oh, I�m just jealous because there are no Serial Underachievers Games.