newest older email

2001-03-11 - 20:31:15

�Huger slump and greater wars and a shallower recovery��

In Burger King, Leicester Square, grabbing a quick Spicy Beanburger before going to see the splendid �Almost Famous�. They never have any ready made, which at least means you know that they haven�t been sat on the rack for 4 hours, but it�s always a bit of a wait. Behind me, a Scottish woman. Quite aggressive, and, not to put too fine a point on it, a junkie. She wants a coffee, and is trying to get her sugar fix, asking how many sachets she can have for free. The assistant doesn�t understand. She wants eight sachets.

Her: I�m an epileptic. I need eight packets for my blood sugar.

Assistant looks confused.

Me(stupidly): Er, I think she means �diabetic��

Her: What the fuck do you know, you fucker? Why don�t you mind your own fucking business?

Me: I was just trying to...

Her: Oh, FUCK YOU!

Worried looking manager approaches with handful of sugar packets and hands them over. I look away sheepishly, hoping she can resist the urge to relocate the scalding contents of her cup to my facial region.

Her: Don�t try and tell ME I�m not diabetic, sunshine�

Me: Er�(suddenly thinks better of debating this point as she wanders away, mumbling).

You�ve got to love London�s glamorous West End.

�Don�t worry, be happy, things�ll get better naturally��

Today�s special guests

Back
hosted by DiaryLand.com